May 11, 2008

A Picture of Perfect Love

Preacher: Bryce Morgan Series: Misc. Messages Scripture: 1 John 4:7–4:10

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A Picture of Perfect Love
I John 4:7-10
May 11th, 2008
Way of Grace Church

I. Intro: Pictures of Love

Recently, I was looking at a photograph of me and a friend, taken many years ago. The picture showed me and him having a great time, hamming it up for the camera. As I smiled about this photo of friendship, I quickly remembered what was going on the weekend that picture was taken. While this friend smiled for the camera, on the inside, he was filled with discontent and anger. This was obvious from several episodes that took place that weekend, episodes in which his bitterness became, for others, hurtfulness.

You see, the photographs we keep, the photographs we hang up on our walls are almost always pictures of love. They are pictures that show the best of times, even if the worst of times is happening just outside the frame.

Because we are human beings, pictures of love, like the one I held in my hand recently, are always ultimately affected by the reality of our hurt, our loss, our selfishness, and our bitterness.

For those who have experienced the life recorded in its pages, a scrapbook, always evokes some hurt as well happiness for those who were there.

There are other pictures of love like this. They are those pictures of love displayed, not in frames on a wall, but in our very lives. Whether you know it or not, all of us have been looking at pictures of love our whole life.

There was the picture of love on display in your parents or parent. There were the pictures of love on display in your friendships or with your siblings. There were the pictures of love on display in your romantic relationships. There are the pictures of love that we see on the cover of a tabloid or up on the big screen.

But like my photograph that only told part of the story, these pictures of love are always ultimately affected by the reality of our hurt, our loss, our selfishness, and our bitterness.

Some of you probably know this well. Some of you would hardly call what your mother or father displayed a picture of love. Some of you would be hesitant to describe a former boyfriend or girlfriend as a picture of love. Maybe a picture of heartache, but not love.

The unfortunate reality though is this: we so often love according to these pictures of love, for the simple reason that we are human beings. As the old saying goes, to err is human.


II. What's Love Got to Do with It?

So what are your pictures of love? This morning I'd like to look at a very, very old letter.

We call this letter I John, because it's the first letter we still possess written by the Apostle John to followers of Jesus Christ living in the first century.

Furthermore, it's a letter that tells us a lot about love.

I don't have to tell you that love is a key ingredient in this thing called life. All of us want it, know we need it, and hope to give it. Our movies, and music, and poetry, and other works of art are filled with love. Love, love, love!

But we struggle to love, don't we? Do you love as you should? Do others love you the way you hope they would? There is so much hurt in this world.

In some sense, the Beatles were right, weren't they? All we need is love. How much pain, sorrow, violence, and injustice would end today if everyone loved as they should, and was loved as they should be loved?

The difficulty here is not in identifying such a need. The difficulty is in figuring out how to make it a reality. We've been trying to make it a reality for thousands of years, but if you look around, if look at your own life, how much progress have we made?

The Apostle John, a man who walked, talked, and ate with Jesus himself, wrote about love. And he wrote some things here that I think can help us if we desire to love as we should.

Listen to I John 4:7-10:

7 Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. 9 In this the love of God has been made manifest among us, that God sent His only son into the world, that we might live through Him. 10 In this is love, not that we have loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

Do you see what John is calling his readers to? He's calling them to love another. He wants them to love the way they should. They had not "arrived" in terms of love, because if they had, John would not have to write this to them.


III. What's God Got to Do With It?

A. God Defines Love

But I want you to see the underlying point of verses 7 and 8. John is saying, "love requires God". Love requires God! There is no escaping it.

If you want to love as you should, God must be part of that equation, because, as John says, love is from God. So if we love as we should, we are from God. And John writes that the opposite of this only confirms the point. Anyone who does not love, cannot say they know God, because God is love.

Let me try to illustrate this. What instrument do we identify with the song, "The Devil Went Down to Georgia?" The fiddle. To love without God is like saying you're going to perform "The Devil Went Down to Georgia", but don't have a fiddle and don't even know how to play the fiddle. Sure you can try to play it with a flute or a piano or a xylophone, but it just wouldn't be the same, would it?

This is what it's like when we try to love without God. Real love requires God.

But John goes further in spelling this out for us. If you want to love as you should, you need God. But why?

B. God's Definition of Love

Well, first off, we need God because God provides the definition of genuine love. Obviously there are many definitions of love out there. There are many pictures of love.

So often we fail to love others as we should because we have settled for a definition of love that is basically synonymous with being nice. We define our duty to others by a standard of civility that calls us to respectfulness, but to a bare minimum of genuine commitment or sacrifice.

But you can be nice to and respectful of someone, and not truly love them. In most cases, these things will be manifestations of genuine love, but they do not define love.

But since love is from God, since God is love, only God can provide the genuine definition.

To understand God's love better, let me present three common pictures of love. After each one, let's look back at I John 4:9, 10 to see the differences with love as God defines it.

Picture #1: From anyone who overheard their conversations, Jack was a great dad. No matter where they were, he was very consistent in telling his children and his wife that he loved them. He was quick to praise them and congratulate them when they did well. No one can ever remember a time when he even raised his voice with them. "I love you, sweety" or "I love you buddy", were just part of his everyday vocabulary. But when his daughter had a school play, he was just too busy to make it. When his wife needed help around the house, he was just too tired to chip in. When his son needed a ride to sports, for whatever reason, he could never make it home in time.

This may be extreme, maybe not, but it is a common picture of love. It is love merely with words. It is love simply through a loving demeanor. But can we really call that love?

Look back at I John 4:9 and 10.

John writes, "In this the love of God was made manifest among us...". Look at the beginning of verse 10, "In this is love...". John is telling his readers about the definition of real love.

He asks, "Do you want to know what love is?" Then look to God. Look at this picture of love.

And what we see from this picture of love is that God's love was more than just words. We don't read that God merely said. We read that God sent. God sent His Son into the world. His love translated into action.

And we know that this simple fact is one of the things that John wants his readers to understand about love. He instructed them one chapter earlier:

Little children, let us not love in word and talk, but in deed and in truth.

When we look to God, we learn that love is more than just words. It is a commitment to action on behalf of another person.

Picture #2: Katie loved being a lawyer. Even in her childhood, she loved to watch courtroom dramas on TV and dreamed of one day arguing before a jury. And now she was really doing well for herself. Because of her drive and willingness to sacrifice for her career, within only a matter of years after law school, she was looking at a good chance for a junior partner position with a prestigious firm. And when it looked like things couldn't get better, she met Bryan. They were crazy about each other. But as things progressed Bryan began to hit some of the roadblocks erected by Katie's commitment to her work. She couldn't make a ceremony in which he was receiving a reward. She couldn't be with him for his father's funeral. In their time together, she often seemed distracted in her thoughts or by the cell phone attached to her side. As he thought about asking Katie to marry him, he wondered if her love for him was being edged out by her love for her career.

Again, this is not an uncommon example in terms of an everyday picture of love. So many of us believe that we can love and not pay any price; that we can have everything we want according to our plans without any cost.

But if we look back to I John 4:9, 10, we see that this God who acted, this God who demonstrated His love for us, was willing to sacrifice, and even sacrifice that which was most precious to Him.

In this the love of God has been made manifest among us, that God sent His only Son into the world, that we might live through Him.

And in 10, He sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins (we'll come back to that strange word), or we could say, he sent Him to be the atoning sacrifice for our sins.

On our behalf, because of His love for us, because of His desire that we might have life, God was willing to have His only Son suffer the difficulties of this broken world, suffer the rejection of men and women, and ultimately suffer on a Roman cross for our good. Which of us would give our child to this kind of suffering for the good of another? Which of us would give ourselves to this kind of suffering for another's good?

But more realistically, which of us is willing to give up things we hold dear, things we really value, for the good of another. Did Katie really love Bryan? Was she willing to give up her career, if it came to that, to be committed to him? Are we willing to give of our time, to give of our monies, are we willing to be uncomfortable in order to love.

Love, as defined by God, real love, is willing to do whatever it takes for another's good.

Picture #3: Doug was the manager of an auto shop. As I waited for my care to be fixed, I talked with him about his work and family. He talked glowingly about how much he loved his new baby daughter. But he lamented that he did not see her as often as he'd like. I asked him if his wife was with their baby right now. "No, the baby's at daycare and my wife is at work." I could tell that he was also somewhat troubled by that arrangement. In response to this discomfort, I asked him if he felt his wife really needed to work. "Well, it would be nice if she didn't have to, but then we wouldn't be able to maintain the lifestyle that we want our daughter to enjoy; we wouldn't be able to give her all of those things she deserves, things that maybe we never had."

Once again, this is not an uncommon picture of love. For Doug, love meant providing for the needs of his daughter; sacrificing, for her good. This is what we've been talking about, isn't it? Isn't this genuine love?

But you see the problem. Doug did not understand his daughter's real needs. She didn't really need all those things he wanted her to have. What she really needed was him. She needed a father; a mother. She needed quality AND quantity time with her parents.

While some people who are in similar positions are simply trying to make ends meet, my sense with Doug was that things could have been different.

We can act and we can even sacrifice for another person, but if we don't understand their real needs and are not meeting those needs, we are not loving them.

C. God's Definition of Our Need

How can I say this? Look at I John 4:10: In this is love, not that we have loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins.

Now propitiation is not a word we use everyday, is it? But it's a great word. Not only is it fun to say, but its meaning is so powerful. A propitiation is a sacrifice that atones, that covers a wrong or wrongs done. It is an atoning sacrifice.

Now, I don't know about you, but if most people were to come up with a wish list, I'm not sure how many people would have atonement for sin in their top ten. We would define our needs differently; maybe a tour of Europe, or a torrid affair, but not atonement for sin.

But God has defined our need here; and God is God. Can we say that God doesn't know best? That God doesn't know what we need? Of course we can't. God knows what we need perfectly.

So love not only acts, and not only acts sacrificially, but we could say this...listen...this is a working definition of genuine love...write it down...love is a passionate concern that labors without limit to see God's best accomplished in someone's life. (x2)

So what is God's best? What is this need that God has defined, that John has highlighted in these verses?

What is this need for which God acted, for which God sacrificed His only Son, by which the Apostle John defines love itself? If this need of ours cost God His own Son, could there be any greater need than this?

If we really thought about it, if we really understood what is involved here, I think everyone one of us would agree that atonement, that forgiveness of sins is what we desperately need.

We do not love as we should. We are not loved as we should be. Instead we hurt others. We are selfish. We are consumed with things that don't matter. We neglect what is right because of laziness. We are proud. We are bitter.

And is anyone happy about these things? Can anyone say, "O not me, I'm perfect!" All of us experience guilt. All of us can think of things that, if we could, we would take back, we do differently. Who would not want forgiveness of sins?

But there is more to it than that. There is ultimate justice in this universe. Just as civil wrongs and criminal wrongs are addressed by our justice system (something I'm assuming we're all happy about), every wrong will one day be addressed; every wrong thing done, every wrong word spoken, every wrong intention of the heart; all of these will be addressed with ultimate justice.

Now this is probably also something we're happy about, especially for those people we think have escaped justice in this life. "Oh he'll get his someday." But I suspect we're less thrilled when all of our actions, words, and thoughts are in question, when it us who will have to face God's justice.

So if there is not something done about these sins that John is taking about, there will be justice served in the presence of God. And trust me, you and I do not want what we deserve, we do not want to hear the sentence given for every sin we've ever committed, whether in word, thought, or deed.

If we understand what is really at stake here, all of us want forgiveness. But there's still more to it than that.

Forgiveness is only one aspect of our most desperate need, what we could call the mother of all needs, or maybe better yet, our Need of needs. Forgiveness is only one aspect of this need, because forgiveness in and of itself does not deal with the root issue.

The root issue is that we do not define life according to God. He is not our ultimate reference point. Isn't that what we've seen in some sense? We do not know how to love because we have not defined love according to God's definition.

But this only points to the fact that we don't define anything according to God, when in fact, our very lives should be defined by who God is and what He wants. We were made for this. But we assume control of our lives and try to be God for ourselves and others. And in doing so, obviously, this is a slap in God's face.

Furthermore, because we do this, we are not really alive; we cut off ourselves off from the One who gives life.

Did you see what it says in verse 9? God gave His Son, so that we might live...because we aren't really living apart from him. And the most desperate need of someone who is dead is life. And life, real life, eternal life, is only found in a right relationship with God.

This is why forgiveness of sins is not an end in itself. Our sin needs to be covered, atoned for, because ultimately, our sin keeps us from God, who is life.

But when our sins are forgiven because of what Christ did on the cross, we can know love like we've never know it before. John put it this way at the beginning of chapter 3:

See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are.

God wants to make you his child through Jesus. Real love leads to real belonging. This is the greatest the love that you and I could know.

And without this love, we cannot really love. You have to know genuine love personally if you ever hope to give it.

It's funny because when we think about what we really need to love others as we should, we define those needs differently. Either we need the other person to change something, or we need to change our circumstances, or we need to fix something from our past. But God says what we really need to is Him in order to change.

John tells us that this is because there's nothing we can do to change ourselves. Instead, according to verse 7, we need to be born of God, that is, remade in Him according to His nature. And if His nature is love, then we will love as we should.


IV. Conclusion: A Picture of Love Received

What does this mean? What does it mean to be born of God and to know God, as John put it in verse 7?

Well life through Jesus comes when we receive the love of God; when we receive the forgiveness that God makes possible through faith in Jesus Christ.

But receiving such a gift is like receiving any gift: you need to empty your hands and reach out and take it.

What we need to let go of is that desire to play God, to control things, to go our way instead of God's. And then we need to reach out with faith. We need to believe that Jesus Christ is our forgiveness, that He is lord; that He is life.

There is another perfect picture of love. It is that family photo of love that will capture all of those who have been born of God and now live through Jesus Christ. It will show brothers and sisters who have received the perfect love of Jesus, and who will one day be perfected in love for all eternity.

Have you received the incomparable love of God? Is God nurturing in you a passionate concern that labors without limit to see God's best accomplished in someone's life. God is inviting you today. Will you be in God's picture because of that picture of the Cross?

 

 

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